Details

Storyteller: Shirley
Tribe: Red Lake Band of Ojibwe
Created: 2018
Location: Minneapolis, MN
Transcript: Mushkosee Equay Indizhinikaz. Migizi Dodem. Misgwamizaga’iganing Indojiba. I am a very proud and happy Anishinabe Equay. I love who I am and what I do with my life. I was born in an Indian Health Services Hospital in Cass Lake and grew up on the Red Lake Nation. From Non-Native standards, I grew up very poor as we did not have water, sewer or piped in heat in our houses. We used an outhouse, got our water from the lake and had a wood stove for heat and cooking. We did not have electricity or even a television until I was 11 years old. Once we got a television, we had to use big, long, stick to be able to get a different channel on our television. We always had a garden, my parents hunted and fished, and did not eat sweets growing up. As kids, we had to plant the seeds, weed the garden and harvest the garden in the fall. We always had healthy vegetables to eat. We canned some of the vegetables to eat over the winter. We ate deer, moose, beaver, rabbit and any other wild animal my parents caught. We also ate a lot of fish during the summer months. As a family, we had to hang the fish nets on a huge device that was designed to hold them and then put the nets in a fishbox to set them in the lake later that night. Then, the next morning at dawn, my parents would go out to pull them out to bring them home. It was Mom who pulled the nets out. She also used to cut down the trees, split the wood and carry the wood back home to put in the stove. My errand was to carry water to the house during the summer. During the winter, Mom would chop a hole in the ice for the water. She also set nets through a hole in the ice in the winter. We had to work hard to survive. From those experiences, my siblings and I developed a hard work ethic that has carried us through our adulthood years. My parents were both practicing alcoholics, which I attribute to the traumas they experienced during their boarding school years. My Dad attended a Catholic school on the reservation and learned corporal punishment from the priests and nuns at the school, which is how we were disciplined. My Mom attended Pipestone Boarding school for five years, where she was beaten often. My Dad was one of the first Red Lake members who graduated from college – University of Minnesota Crookston, MN. My Mom attended school up to the eighth grade.

I loved school from the 1st grade. I enjoyed reading, writing and thinking about things. Some of my most profound and influential role models were my teachers in school. However, at home, I witnessed alcoholism and domestic violence which I wanted to forget about and repress as it was too traumatic to talk about or think about. I later utilized therapy, support groups and ceremonies to help myself to heal those wounds. Also, as an adult, I asked her, "Mom, why did you stay with Dad even though he beat you?" She answered, "When I was young, my brothers and sisters beat me, the boarding school people beat me, so, when I got with your Dad, I thought that was normal." I said, "Mom, that was not normal." She refused to publicly talk about the violence inflicted on her. I think it was just too hard and shameful for her. Also, she did not want to publicly shame him. Mom left him when I was in my early 20's. I went away to a Catholic boarding school when I was 15 years old. They taught an Indian studies class which helped me stay connected with my culture and my history. Also, I went to school with another tribal member. She used to do beadwork and had me help her with her beading. I visited my relatives in the Twin Cities every weekend and stayed bonded with my family. When they first started Indian week in the Twin Cities in 1972, I missed school for that whole week to participate in those cultural activities. I graduated from Good Counsel Academy in 1972. It was good, progressive school that taught me self-discipline and critical thinking skills. After graduation, I moved to the Twin Cities area where Mom and my younger siblings were. During the 1970’s, I got too involved in the party life as many of our Native younger people were into that. This was also during the civil rights and hippy era. I wanted to fit in, so, I did it too. I finally realized drinking alcohol was not even something I enjoyed, much like smoking cigarettes. Later on, I decided I needed to do something more positive in my life as I was growing older without a goals or goals. In my later 20’s, I decided to set a goal, so, I finished with my Bachelor’s degree from Metropolitan State University. I went to William Mitchell College of Law and graduated from there. I took the bar exam five times before I passed it. I was not going to let a test stop me from becoming a lawyer. I became a lawyer after so many trials and tribulations. During one time I was studying for the bar exam, my Dad passed away. I worked at Hennepin County District Court as a law clerk during those years. I eventually took time off and passed the bar. Then went on to practice law which included representing my own tribe, other tribes, and many people in my career. I attended law school, which at the time, was an institutionally racist place which caused me to feel alienated most of the time. I was so shy, I hardly spoke there. My best friend, Rockell said to me, “How do these other people even know you as you hardly speak?” I graduated at the bottom of my class, but, never cheated and always kept my ethics and values.

The two biggest influences in my life were my Mom and Dad. Dad showed me his brilliant mind through questioning people and events. He spoke our language fluently and knew a lot of the traditional stories. He was a awesome story teller. He had us sit around him while he told us stories during the winter about Nanabozhoo and other similar stories. We lived in Obashing or Ponema until I was 10 years old. Dad used to help the send-off man with singing and shaking the rattles. His biggest drawback was the drinking. Even though he drank, he did not want any of his kids to become alcoholic like him. His spirit name is Mis-co-co-naw-aye (Red Robe/Cloak). My second most profound influence was my Mom. She showed me humility, pride and resilience. When she left Dad in the early 1970’s, she quit drinking and raised my younger sisters and brother on her own. She started out with A.A. and going to church. She eventually had A.A. meetings in her home with my older sister, her husband and other Native community members. They had their meetings every Friday where they brought potluck meals to their homes. She then started going to sweat lodge and Sundance ceremonies. She sundanced for many years under a spiritual leader named Martin High Bear. He gave her her spirit name in Lakota. She translated it into Anishinabe which is Mino Manitou Equay (Good spirit Woman). She brought me and my siblings into ceremonies including dark room and sweats. She also was there for me when I fasted. She was standing there waiting for me when I first came down the hill. I told her I had a headache. She said, “You just need coffee.” I realized I was used to drinking coffee and did not know that. The fasting helped me get back in touch with me and my goals in life. I firmly believe I am here for a reason – that Gitchi manitou sent me here to help Native people in whatever way I can. My vision for my Anishinabe people is to help them become healthy and happy people again, the way we were a long time ago. I would like us to go back to our original values and teachings of sharing, caring, humility, bravery, honesty and courage. We are a fantastic and beautiful people and are not just what the media portrays us as.

Yes. I have become more immersed in my culture. I practiced some ceremonies when I was growing up on our reservation, which I cannot publicly discuss. When I was growing up there, I attended every pow wow we had on our reservation as I loved the sound of the drum and seeing beautiful Natives dancing and having fun. Because we could not afford it, I was too poor to have regalia. Now, I am a jingle dress dancer and attend pow wows and love it. When I started dancing again after becoming a lawyer, I had a ceremony at the Minneapolis American Indian Center. Porky White spoke for me and had me come out into circle. At that time, I got another Anishinabe name – Muchkosee Equay. Mary Roberts, an Elder from Canada gave it to me. Mary told me that Mother Earth named me herself which meant I could use any color I want on my dress. At the Center, I danced in a circle with the jingle dress dancers fanning me. I had an Elder, Mary Ann Johnson, bring me out and re-connect me with the pow-wow spirits. Porky was so happy as not many dancers do this anymore where someone brings them out to introduce them or welcome them into the circle. We make our regalia to reflect our Anishinabe names. My one nephew’s name is Descending Cloud – his regalia had blue and white colors to reflect the cloud and sky. I love to hear the beat of the drum as it speaks to my spirit. I only dance traditional as I don’t think money should be the reason for dancing. Some of our Native people have become too influenced by money and having the money be the major reason for dancing. I love going to sweats and ceremonies as I believe that is some of the essence of our Native people. We are all similar in that we have beautiful ceremonies and welcome others to our ways. If we are walking in a good way, we are inclusive versus exclusive. I love to sing, dance and pray.

I love our wonderful culture, our people, my family, my clan, my community and would not have it any other way. I participate and practice my ways a lot although I am still learning and will be a life-long learner. I attend pow wow's here and go to them with my family. My brothers both sing. My brother dances. My younger sister dances. I am happy and proud to be an Anishinabe Equay. Also, I advocate for the babies in my family to have Anishinabe ways as I believe that Gitchi Manitou asks us our spirit names when we go to the spirit world. If we don’t know our names, we cannot go to the spirit world. Another thing I have advocated for is to enroll the children as they can benefit from education and other services if they are enrolled. Although I don’t believe in the blood quantum concept as it is exclusive, it helps our people to obtain services they would not otherwise qualify for if they were not enrolled.